Put First Things First
~Habit #3, 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey
When I started Solo Stove with my brother, there was a lot of hard work and challenges. I’m not talking just about the challenges of starting and growing a business. That was only part of the challenge for me. Because I was also employed with a full time job while starting Solo Stove, time was especially scarce. The other part of the challenge was how to start and grow a business while remembering to give my children and wife the time they deserved.
I’ll be honest, it would have been so easy to have spent all of my time outside of my full time job on Solo Stove. It was fun, exciting and challenging for me. But that would have been the easy thing to do and the wrong thing to do because that would have left very little time for my family. Most people will say that their family is most important, but their actions sometimes say otherwise. I knew my family was and still is most important and I had to have my actions back that up.
One way I can figure out what’s most important to me is by asking the question, “when I’m about to die, what am I going to be thinking about?”. I won’t be thinking about work. I won’t be thinking about money. I won’t be thinking about my possessions. I will be thinking about my loved ones – my wife, my children and other family members. Most people would agree with this.
The hard part is to always remember what’s most important and have this perspective in your daily life because like long term investing, you have to invest your time as early as possible to get the future results you want. You can’t wait until you’re near the end of your life to make it up. You have to invest your time into your relationship with your spouse and children everyday to reap the rewards much further in the future. So you have to have faith that your invested time with your family today will be worth much more in the future.
Understanding that my wife and children are most important I knew what my north star was. That would guide me with lifestyle decisions. For example, how would I work on Solo Stove without taking time away from my family? I decided that the best option was to work on it when they all slept. I used the time I would have spent sleeping for working on Solo Stove, so I wouldn’t have to take time away them. It was a hard sacrifice (and unsustainable) to make because I love sleeping, but I was determined.
The other challenge that can cause you to lose sight of your north star is when you have to choose between time working or time with your family. What do you choose?
Once I began working on Solo Stove full time from home, it would have been easy for me to work from 8am to 9pm. Work is never done. Almost always, work can wait though. I chose to spend my mornings helping my wife get the kids ready and walking them to school. I tried to be flexible during the day to run errands and would pick up my kids after school or take them to their after school activities. I wasn’t perfect at this but I used this principle of a north star to create focus and balance with my time. I often would ask myself, “If I lose my marriage and my kids, what I’m doing, though it may seem important, is all for naught”.
Invest in what’s important to you now. Always remember what your north star is and diligently follow it.
Gradual Ascent 